Will

I've known since Isabella Faye has been home that she is strong-willed. About six months after she was home, I decided that I would break it. I determined that strong-willed equals bad, wrong, needing over-the-top discipline. I assumed she had developed this due to lenient parenting because we were just so thankful she was home and going overboard to help her attach and feel secure. Then I blamed her caregivers, thinking they weren't hard enough on her. Then I blamed her diet, the weather, teething and on and on until finally, a few nights ago, I decided it was all my fault. I must be the worst parent ever. I screamed and cried and begged God to show me what I was doing wrong.
The next day, I began to seek advice from trusted parents, and read and read. Then I began to pray.
What God is showing me is that Isabella Faye's will wasn't made, it was born. No one is at fault, because nothing is wrong. God created Isabella Faye with that strong will and he knew when he created her that she was to be our child. Obviously, he thought we were up to the challenge.
That's another thing, Isabella Faye's strong-will is not a problem to be solved, its a challenge to be won! Hubby and I, as her parents, are not charged to Isabella Faye's will, but to it, shape it. We are to foster an environment where she can learn to control and use her strong will for good. I am realizing that there are so many good things about being strong-willed. Imagine what a force for our Heavenly Father my little girl can grow up to be - strong willed, undeterred from spreading the message of His salvation and unconditional love; strong-willed, passionately seeking to be the wife, mother, employee, friend that God has called her to be; strong willed to face the tragedies of life with determination to survive and become better, stronger, wiser through them.
Oh how wrong I've been but oh how His grace is sufficient! Isabella Faye will not be forever scarred by my misunderstanding of who she is. God will see to that.
Now I start anew. This is not to say that I won't correct and punish her when she needs it. I will have to be firm, steadfast, diligent, creative. But I will punish her with understanding when I do...praising my great God, our perfect Heavenly Father. God sees the future and He knows what lies ahead for Isabella Faye. He knows that this little girl needs this strong, independent, determined will and I thank Him, praise Him for equipping her now.